Most times I see people speaking and I wonder how come they seem so relaxed and so sure of themselves.
 
Kingsley Grant - Career Change CoachHave you ever had those thoughts as well or is it only me?
 
If like me you’ve had those thoughts, what has been your assumptions or conclusions?
 
Here’s what I’ve thought.
  • These people are seasoned speaker so they should look confident and relaxed.
  • It’s in their genes. They were born like that.
  • They have hired coaches and worked on these skills for quite some time.
 
All the above are reasonable guesses or assumptions, wouldn’t you say?
 
But, the question is, can you become or look as confident as they do? 
 
Before we tackle that issue, why is it even necessary to want to become a confident speaker especially if speaking is not something you are pursuing as a profession?
 
Have you ever been at a party and seen people who looked very confident as they rotate in and out of conversations? Do you have that co-worker who dominates the workspace exuding such confidence as he or she make his or her way around the office?
 
If you have, do you sometimes feel envious of them? Come on, be honest. I have. And sometimes I wish that was me. I’m not sure I’ve gone as far as being envious. Maybe close.
 
This is just a couple examples of why I believe having confidence as a speaker is something you should aspire towards.
 
 
 
 
 
Here Are the 3 Secrets to Become a More Confident Speaker.
 
 
I have referenced this point in some of my past articles. If you have read any of them, you might have seen it. 
 
You might say, why Toastmasters? Do I get paid for promoting them? No. Toastmasters is made up of volunteers who pay a small fee bi-annually to be a member. It is an international organization that helps professionals develop as leaders and proficient speakers.
 
I have been a part of the organization for several years now. I promote it because I believe in it. I have become a more confident and proficient speaker as a result of being a member and attending meetings quite regularly.
 
The good news is that most major cities around the world and even in some rural cities, have a Toastmasters club. Join one.
 
2. Speak often
 
I cannot emphasize this point enough. The more you speak, the better and more confident you become. 
 
Speaking is like a muscle, the more you use it the stronger it become.
 
Whenever you get an opportunity to speak, accept it. Here’s something you need to consider: make speaking about the people who is going to benefit from what you have to say. Don’t make it about whether you sound or look good.
 
This is the downfall of so many people who “try” their hand at becoming a more confident speaker. They make it about them. The more you do that, the more self-conscious you’ll become and the less you’ll want to continue. The more attention you give to any one thing, the stronger it becomes.
 
My point is, speak as often as possible thinking more about those who will benefit from what you have to say.
 
3. Have something of value to present
 
Think about what it is you want those to whom you speak know, do or feel after hearing you. It is the late Steven Covey who said, “begin with the end in mind.” Think about what it would take to have your audience leave with your end goal.
 
It might be that you want them to leave knowing that the world is round. If that is your objective, you will be creating a persuasive speech. You want to persuade them to see it the way you do. 
 
What would they need to know?
 
They will need to know how you came to that conclusion. They will need to know your sources along with your credentials. They will also need to know who else believes or hold to this view.
 
In essence what you are doing is building a case for them to accept. 
 
When you are able to do something like this, it becomes valuable to them.
 
You might now be wondering what makes me credible to write this post and if so, I applaud you. [smile] As one who have done all the above and coached others to do the same, I am passing on to you what I know works. I hope that satisfies your curiosity. 
 
Now go and be the confident speaker I believe you are going to become.
 
 
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