CONFLICT RESOLUTION CAN BE CHALLENGING
“Whichever of you consider yourself the most mature, take the lead!”
This is what I say to people who find themselves in conflict with one or more people. This is one of the conflict resolution skills that I teach.
So many times people find themselves stuck in a relational “stand-off” because of a conflict with a family member, co-worker, classmate, or business partner and there seem to be no end in sight. No one wants to budge.
Have you ever experienced this or have you seen this in your surroundings?
What do you do when you are involved or is called in to help resolve a conflict where each party or parties, are claiming their right to not budge?
This can be really challenging especially when it is disrupting the lives of other people around them not to mention, impacting productivity.
FOR A MATURE AUDIENCE
Whenever I’ve been brought in to help people resolve their issues and after I have listened intently to both sides and taught them new communication skills, I then say to them, “whichever of you consider yourself the most mature one, take the lead; take responsibility for your part and apologize.”
This is the hard part.
This is where they are stuck. Everyone wants to be right, which cannot happen. Because once someone gets the go-ahead to be right, the other feels defeated.
This often leads to a change in the relationships among those involved. There is an awkwardness in their interactions. The relationship is never the same unless…
… unless the parties all take responsibility and offer apologies. People generally will be more accepting of that kind of outcome where no one “wins.”
In my opinion, one side is very rarely 100% in the wrong. There’s almost always a contributory factor that led to the conflict. I use the phrase almost always because there are exceptions.
BE A RESPONSILBE ADULT
However, the main point is that when we find ourselves in conflict, we need to look at what role we played in what happened. Again, it may not be a huge role, but if we look closely, we could find something.
It may be our tone of voice. It may be the words we choose to respond. It may be our body language. It may be our attitude … we could find something.
Most times our pride gets in the way. We want to be right. We want to save face. We want to be powerful. We want to win! To humble ourselves and take responsibility, is bruising to our pride.
Here’s where I ask this question: “How is it working?”
As you’ve seen, conflict resolution is not an easy process. It is possible but it’s not easy. However, it can be expedited and lessen the potential relational damage, when we take the first move and apologize for our part. We need to be the ADULT—the mature one.
Will you be the ADULT–the mature one–today? Will you model that to your team, family, friends, or business partner(s)?
It won’t be easy at first, but with practice, you become better at it. Try it!
If this is an area that you need help in, let me know. There are other tools and strategies that I use to help my clients and it’s also a part of some of the presentations that I give to groups. If you know of a group that could use my service, please let me know. You can see some short videos of me speaking HERE.
Remember, I’m here to help you Optimize for success! So reach out today!
If you are interested in being coached in this area or have me consult with or present to a group that you are a part of or know a group that could benefit from this kind of teaching, reach out to me and let me know.
In the meantime, leave a comment below to share your thoughts with us.
====================================
PS: I’m creating a course for those who want to START A BUSINESS ONLINE FROM HOME on the side for now, but is feeling overwhelmed as to where to start, how to find time to do so, and who to trust. If you relate to any of that, this course is for you and here’s the good news … it has a money back guarantee. You’ll have nothing to lose. Even if you request a reimbursement, you’ll have learned something.
IF YOU SIGN UP BEFORE THE BEGIN DATE OF MARCH 1, 2018, YOU’LL SAVE $50
Here’s the link: www.startabusinessonlinefromhome.com/beginnerscourse
